The Lone Ranger

Plot: Native American warrior Tonto recounts the untold tales that transformed John Reid, a man of the law, into a legend of justice. (via.)

Matt's Rating: C+

Matt's Review: I can't get that god damned William Tell song out of my head.

There's not much substance to this summer blockbuster. It's a fun film that is loaded with runaway trains, gun fights, and leaping white horses, but it lacks any of the things that make good superhero movies...good. You never truly root for the Lone Ranger, it's incredibly predictable, and none of the characters have any depth.

Armie Hammer actually does a decent job of portraying this new Lone Ranger. The problem lies in the fact that he's too goofy. This is not the fault of Hammer but its just how Gore Verbinski and the writers have transformed the character.  If you're looking for an intense new Lone Ranger, you wont find it here. And ultimately that's the biggest problem with the film. There is virtually no change in Armie Screwdriver's character. He starts as the anti-gun slightly bumbling lawyer named John Reid and transforms into a gun wielding bumbling guy in a mask named The Lone Ranger. He never finds that edge that you would hope your new hero of the west would have.

There is also no theme or message in this action packed summer flick. Where films like Man of Steel, Dark Knight, and Iron Man show the origins of heroes with a solid theme or subplot, Lone Ranger just shows his quirky origins without any of the additional elements needed to tell a compelling story.

The movie tries to get a little dark at times but never holds that mood long enough to maintain a constant tone. We watch through a reflection in John Reid's eyes as a man cuts out another man's heart and eats it. But this gory moment, and the feelings that come with it, is never replicated. So, in the end this scene sticks in your mind simply because it was out of place.

While in the Pirate films Verbinski showed us why he is a talented version of Michael Bay, in Lone Ranger he misses in all the ways he succeeded during his last franchise. The action sequences are a little too long, the characters are flat, and the suspense is virtually non-existent.

On the bright side, Johnny Depp is great and he and Armie Crowbar have really good chemistry. In fact, they are the sole reason I could add the "+" to the" C" I was going to give the film. Depp brings the same life and comedy to Tonto that he brought to his part in Pirates. In fact his scenes with the white horse (another bright spot in the film) are some of the best moments in the film. But it might not be a good thing that the best parts of a movie are between your highest paid actor and an animal. 

It's a fun summer movie but nothing more than that. 

You Haven't Seen That Yet? - The Proposal

Plot: Sandra Bullock stars... as a Canadian immigrant who creates a demanding and difficult work environment for her subordinates at the office. When the news arrives that she's about to be deported to the Great White North, she rushes into a marriage of convenience with her young assistant (Ryan Reynolds) to prevent such a catastrophe from occurring. (via.)

Nicole's Rating: A

Matt Hasn't Seen this Chick Flick!: I'm not a great lover of chick-flicks or anything overly romantic or objectifying. Nicholas Sparks can go to hell, as far as I'm concerned. However, when I find a good one that I think works on multiple levels, I'm enthusiastic in my endeavors to prove that it's also good enough for a man. Just because it's marketed at females doesn't mean it has to be lady only, 'naw'mean?

Sandra, aka Sandy, Bullock is a ridiculously underrated actress (or at least she was up until 2009, when both The Proposal and The Blind Side came out. Sandy got her due!). She's hilarious. I love her. I love almost everything she does. I mean, 2009 was also the year of All About Steve, a movie I did not see that was, by all accounts, horrible. Sandy won a Razzie for her role in that film, and actually showed up to graciously accept the award! Girl is as cool as they get.

Anyway, I thought The Proposal was great. Not only is Sandra Bullock THE BEST, but Betty-can-do-no-wrong-White also has a small role in the movie as Grandma Annie. And, you know, Ryan Reynolds is in it. And he's hot. In fact, he may be in Matt's mantourage. Or at least only one or two actors removed from actually making the mantourage. (Matt carefully maintains who stays in his mantourage. It's a big deal.)


Matt's Rating: B

Matt's Review: Nicole tends to hand out "A's" like hotcakes. Fortunately for the sake of mediocre movies everywhere, I do not.

First off, I saw this movie a while ago and it's a little fuzzy to me. But, I do remember liking the chemistry between Bullock and Reynolds. I also think I laughed out loud quite a bit, which is something of a rarity with me. So, that's good.

But let's move on to something more important: All this business about my "mantourage." This needs to be straightened out ASAP.  First off, a "mantourage" may sound a little...odd. These are the dudes in Hollywood I would want to go to a bar dressed in a suit with, drink with, and cause ruckus with. Picture Oceans 11. It's Robinson's 5 (Why 5? 'Cause I have standards). As of now it's pretty much the cast from Ocean's 11 too: Matt Damon, George Clooney, and Brad Pitt start the group. Rounding out my 5 imaginary drinking buddies are Nathan Fillian and Val Kilmer (though Kilmer has been fairly invisible recently. Not good, Val! Get yourself in check). There are guys waiting in the wings like Jack Nicholson, Ryan Reynolds, Bill Murray and Bruce Willis, but there simply isn't enough room.  Make no mistake, this group has nothing to do with acting talent. These are the guys I want to take to a bar. This is the group of guys that have you thinking "Tonight's going to be a great night, in the worst ways possible." Think about turning to your girlfriend and going, "If you don't hear from me in ten hours just assume I'm either passed out on Brad Pitt's couch or I'm in Vegas with George. Either way, my cell's dying so text Kilmer if you really need to reach me." Picture yourself striding into a bar with that diverse group: Clooney, Pitt, Kilmer, Damon, and Fillian. Boom.

Anyway, The Proposal was decent.

You Haven't Seen That Yet? - There Will Be Blood

Plot: The story chronicles the life and times of one Daniel Plainview, who transforms himself form a down-and-out silver miner raising a son on his own into a self-made oil tycoon. When Plainvew gets a mysterious tip-off that there's a little town out West where an ocean of oil is oozing out of the ground, he heads with this son, H.W., to take their chances in the dust-worn Little Boston. In this hardscrabble town, where the main excitement centers around the holy roller church of charismatic preacher Eli Sunday. Plainview and H.W. make their lucky strike. But even as the well raises all of their fortunes, nothing will remain the same as conflicts escalate and every human value - love, hope, community, belief, ambition and even the bond between father and son - is imperiled by corruption, deception and the flow of oil. (via)

Matt's Rating: A

Why He's Appalled Nicole Hasn't Seen It: Two reasons - 1) Paul Thomas Anderson and 2) Daniel Day Lewis. Nicole LOVES Magnolia and so I always assumed she was a big fan of P.T. Anderson. All his movies have a distinct feel and There Will Be Blood holds true to that.  Daniel Day Lewis won the Oscar for this role and it is a performance any movie fan should watch. Some argue that it's the same character from Gangs of New York but I think if you go back and watch each film you will see the subtle differences in each one. Anderson's mastery can be seen as each scene and every shot serves an important purpose to the story and characters (plus it's beautifully shot). I'm not usually a big fan of character driven films (I'm much more of a traditional plot/theme driven guy) but the characters, actors, and the way the film was crafted has always stuck with me. Its one of the few movies I remember thinking as I watched it "This is not a movie, it's a film." It is the complete package. Also, since 2007 I can't remember a drama coming out that had people quoting it. I. Drink. Your. Milkshake.

Nicole's Rating: A+

Nicole's Review: This was one of those films where - I feel like I cheated myself in waiting so long to see it. I was truly missing out. It was amazing in all aspects - story, dialogue, cinematography, acting. Tension threads throughout the film, building from the accident which makes Plainview a father in the very beginning, through Plainview's "redemption" as forced by the zealot, Eli Sunday, and eventually to the shocking final scene:

Here, if you have a milkshake, and I have a milkshake, and I have a straw. There it is, that's the straw, you see? You watching? And my straw reaches across the room, and starts to drink your milkshake. I. Drink. Your. Milkshake! I drink it up! 

Also, we all know Daniel Day-Lewis is probably one of the most, if not THE most, talented actors out there today. He's turns films to gold. I even like Gangs of New York, even though Matt hates it. But, I was also really pleased with Paul Dano's performance in this movie. I loved him in Little Miss Sunshine and was happy to see what a great actor he is. I know he's done some indie flicks since this - I think I need to catch up on some Dano.